Remembering the quarantine

More than half of the year has passed, and about five months have been under quarantine, from the enhanced community quarantine (ECQ) to modified enhanced community quarantine (MECQ), general community quarantine (GCQ), and so on. Many of us may have gone through different phases of emotional and even physical distress during those times.

I have been fine in the early weeks of quarantine. However, as I needed to work on various school requirements and family concerns, emotions came rushing in with no warning. In those times, I think that the worst experience is when my mind wanders off to past events, dreams, and plans—having the time to reflect also made it challenging to focus on and appreciate the present.

Is it the same with everyone?

I can never present my experiences as the same as everyone else’s. We all have our moments and our ways of facing our giants. We may have similarities in our experiences and the emotions that we carry, yet we can never say that we are the same. Instead, we can declare that we can relate to each one. This global health pandemic has truly left a scar in the hearts of many. A scar that will remind us of the events that brought thousands of deaths, thousands of people jobless, and many more sad memories we have to carry in the coming years. However, does it end there?

During the quarantine, I felt distressed early in the morning when some memories of plans made and canceled, dreams never started, or even simple tasks that I could do anymore greeted me. It did seem that my mind was my worst enemy during those moments. In hindsight, people may think that it is easy to control your mind from presenting those memories. However, that is not the case for me. I believe that our minds, our thinking, serve the most drastic punch to our hearts.

Hope is still there

Despite all those moments of weakness, I am still able to find hope. There are mornings where I pause and let those thoughts accompany me for a while. However, once I get the strength to move, I pray. This moment is where I learned that I need to offer everything to the Lord as I know that I cannot face my giants alone. There is this sense of fear lurking to eat me alive once I welcome it to my day. Yet, as I listen to music, read the Bible, or devotional for the day, I feel reassured by the Lord’s great presence and promise.

This experience may not be the case for everyone right now as we find ways to fight our giants the best we can. However, it is also a good reminder to know that we are not alone in this battle as we have the loving Father to help us, guide us, and walk with us through all these trials. I pray that this new week can bring us peace in our minds and hearts. Happy Sunday!

Hinga, May Isa Pa

Sa pagsayaw ng liwanag ng kandila sa ating harapan
Pakaliwa’t pakanang pagsabay sa ating bawat paghinga
Minsan inaakala nating patapos na ang problemang noo’y nagpahirap
Sa puso nating punong-puno na ng di magagandang alaala
Na may iilang natirang peklat katabi nang unti-unting naghihilom na sugat

Kaso sa bawat hakbang pasulong at sa paglapat ng liwanag
Dahan-dahang nagbabalik ang hapdi sa mga gasgas na naghilom
Na ipinanalangin natin nang taimtim na sana’y di na magbalik
Pero ngayo’y nagbabadyang muling bumukas at magpahirap
Na muling kikirot habang pilit nating huwag pansinin

Kaya yata talaga matalinghaga ang takbo ng ating tadhana
Minsan ang liwanag kasi’y natatakpan ng mga ulap
Na pilit naman nating itinataboy sa pag-ihip
Ng mainit na hiningang nagsasabing

Ako at ika’y buhay pa

Na ano man ang mangyari, may isa pa tayong panangga
Ang huminga at magpatuloy sa pagharap sa kung ano pang ibato ng tadhana

Matuto rin tayong magpahinga upang tayo ay makalaya
Ihanda ang ating mga mata sa pagmasid sa paglubog at pagsikat ng araw
Magasgasan mang muli, kumirot mang muli ang ating mga puso
Mabulag man saglit sa kislap ng liwanag ng mga nakaraan
Tayo ay magpapatuloy, may isa pa tayong hininga

Music Playlist for the Rainy Days

Wild fire kisses the first rain drop
With the wind for the moonlight
Of ashes waving their final goodbye
As the rainy day comes for their welcome

Flames throw a great pas de deux
With the touch lingering in the heart
Of the prisoners of the dark
Praying for a savior in the light

This is the rainy day
To quench the thirst
To brighten the way
For those lost and dried
Out of ropes to climb
And hopes or smiles

 

Daily Clutch

Memories flash for the person leaving the room on the East Wing
Clutching the ends of the last string connecting A to B
Of spaces and stories, of friends, lovers, and miseries
Looking for the perfect rhyme, opening the door to a great line
Praying for the light to come and stop the flight
Of feelings, pains, and all the lightness of being
‘Coz the trip home is the last stop for the best poem
That captures the heart, the essence, the dreams sighed out
Of the missed role of the poet, dying, lying, moving the last roll
That intertwines the paths of the living and the ones leaving

Midnight

“I want to see a rainbow,” Abie said.

“Alright, tomorrow,” Mom answered while she was in bed.

“No! I want to see it today,” the young girl insisted.

“Don’t do this darling. Mommy can’t walk you there today. Tomorrow instead.”

“Why? You never keep your promise,” Abie ran out the door.

“Tomorrow.”

The lines went flat that night. It was the yesterday and today at midnight.

Abie woke up, smiled, and walked out the room.

“It’s beautiful!”

Dad came rushing out with red swollen eyes.

“Wh…What are you doing here?” clearing his throat in between.

“Mommy kept her promise. I saw the rainbow, Dad.”