Tag: thoughts

Of Weddings and Rainy Days

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As the door opens, the bright shine of the sun gives a quick blinding trap for the guests’ eyes. Right then, as their eyes adjust to the light, they see the silhouette of another bright gem entering the hall. This moment is the start of till death do us part.

How does a wedding’s captivating bride’s first walk become when it’s the rainy season already? Plus, in the middle of a global pandemic, will the wedding bells still ring for the lovely couples out there.

Wedding Bells, Dreams Coming Alive

Tens and thousands of people tie the knot in 12 months. Many pleasant dreams come true each day of the year, yet some worries also begin at that moment.

Is it true that after such a happy moment, teardrops will come after this? That sure is a unique scene to watch as happy cries turn to shouts and painful tears after just a couple of years. Couples endure and push through as the storm comes and goes. Wouldn’t it be a memorable experience to go through this stage together?

Recently, there has been news of celebrity couples separating. Many fans are affected as they learn that the one they thought to be happy ever after love story turns to a messy news break. There sure is a lot still hoping to have their celebrity idols/crushes fight for their “fairy tale” love affair. However, that is not how life goes.

I may not exactly be the best person to talk about this; however, with the people around me and my age, I think I somehow get a better idea of how people make relationships. There is this dream state when everyone is still in the sweet stage of entering a relationship, but then when the “spark” disappears, they end it there as well. Something that I learned from my parents who have had (still have) struggles in their married life, is that staying in a relationship is a commitment that both parties should make.

Commitment and Endings

Quit Facebook for a week? No, that’s too much.

Go on a diet for a month? Halfway through the month, you say, “Nope. This is not for me. I love how I am now.” Then you go stop eating healthier.

There sure are a lot of challenges along the way that make it difficult for you to stay committed to a task that you started in the first place. You may think that it is just a normal phase; however, the often you quit in the middle of such activity, the worse you feel.

The same goes for the commitment in a relationship. Well, not entirely on the same weight of responsibility, but you may have a picture of this by now. Still, no matter the action you wish to put in this kind of scenario, there will always be that little yet painful thorn in the middle of the process. It is a chance where couples need to re-evaluate somehow the way they go through their relationships and later on, their marriage.

Why am I writing a piece about this in the first place? Honestly, it is a simple answer to seeing inspiration from several acquaintances who are getting married. Even my closest friends are engaged by now. ❤

The knowledge of my friends tying the knots somehow gave me that hope for the future that even with the difficulties of today, people will still look forward to the coming new beginnings. With this, I am not saying that couples should all get married. I believe that each one has a unique path to take, distinct moments to experience, and the right time to find their own life goal. Many may not even be the marrying type, that even single-blessedness is a gift from God. This reflection for today is simply a reminder to look at the little blessings that may come into my life every day. It may not be the moment to walk down the aisle and say I do, however, it is a chance for me to realize that there is that sweet delight in seeing people in love and are willing to commit in a relationship. This kind of decision is a glimmer of hope that no matter what happens in the future, and despite a global pandemic, they are willing to take responsibility by promising a lifetime next to their partner. The pouring rain now is welcomed as a blessing instead of a bad omen.

I know many will not agree to these realizations/observations of mine. I welcome those thoughts as it is a time for us to look into our daily lives beyond the walls of our homes. We may still be in quarantine. However, we can always connect with others; choose well who you keep in your circle. There is much negativity out there, yet there are still tons of positive stories, experiences, scenarios, and even people who are just waiting to be discovered. So, let’s look up in the sky and hug the new rain coming as we see the smile form on the bride’s lips as she walks towards the new hope she picked.

Start of another journey

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In times when everything seemed dried out of life, there are those little workers who keep on doing their part to keep death from turning up one day. Even in life, there are a lot of struggles and even some walls that stop us along the way. However, we can see them as the finish line or we can enjoy the rest and then find a detour to continue our run.

In the years after university, I faced a lot of those walls. I even came to a point where I felt worried and lost. There were moments when I gave up and didn’t see the meaning of the events happening in my life. It was, however, during those lowest moments did I give everything up to the Lord and I rested. It was not an easy journey. I had years of simply worrying about the coming days that I was too stubborn to listen to the Lord’s plan. I wanted to go my way. I wanted to achieve the dreams I thought were right for me to take. Then, only after all those hardships along the way did I enjoy the precious second of surprise as I was still led to a purposeful road which I truly love.

Now, I am still just at the start of that new road and I would like to be one of the workers to help in keeping the belief alive. There are many ways to reach our destination, we just needed some guidance and some recalibration so that we won’t hinder from the one that was designed for us.

Many may not have the same belief as I do, still, it is a good experience to share. It may even be a good chance for others to check on their current place in this run. There sure are a lot of interesting views to see and a number to better understand.

Getting back to writing

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Have you ever experienced being stuck in the neverending cycle of waking up, commuting to work, getting to the office, commuting back home, and then simply just falling asleep?

I never really had this kind of problem before, however, as I get older and as I become more acquainted with the busy work life, it seems like I simply lost the light I once had. For instance, I used to enjoy writing down my thoughts and sharing stories with people around me. Now, with my work related to checking papers, attending meetings, writing down comments on various activities, I can’t seem to find the time to simply sit down and write. In this case, write to me and not for any work-related requirement.

I haven’t been active in any platform consistently, as there is a bunch of available outlets in the entire world wide web. Still, it is good to be able to stick to something and enjoy the moment. I hope to be able to find this space in the vast online community. I know that I may simply just use my laptop’s notes for these, but it is still good to have it available for others to read. Maybe there is one out there who would wish to hear these kinds of sentiments as well. After all, I do sometimes forget that I am not the only one with feelings of such worry, exhaustion, or even a sense of longingness. An emotion that I wish to jump back to right away. With that, I hope that this new note will remind me to simply pause and write my stories again. I may not be (may ever be) a well-known writer out there, but it is still a good opportunity for me to have a voice and give life to the thoughts in my mind. Sometimes, those ideas get too much in my head that they make it impossible for me to accomplish anything productive, in terms of work. So, let this be a start.

It may have been quite late as the strict quarantine period due to the pandemic is about to be lifted. Nonetheless, I hope to be able to juggle all these worries about the current health concerns of the world and that of my little world of life.

Breathe Free

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The soil was made and so was man. Every cell, every breath, every time is the same for everyone else’s, so why not yours?

Experience. Life happens. The pen writes when the storyteller begins to speak. The hour hand turns after minutes have passed and seconds have completed the rounds.

You see, he speaks, she hears, they feel

We all bleed the same in the end

Dreams rushing to the open air
Memories running back for more
Hopes and wishes of years gone by

All bleeds for time to heal, life to come again
Nostalgia in the heart
Logic in the mind
The end is still the end

Originally posted at https://theprose.com/jmasalgado

Rekindling the Drive for Writing

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As I worked through my new job this year, there had been little time left for me to do any writing. I mean, typing stories or poems for myself. There had been enough hours for me to simply relax and sleep. I wanted time off from facing my Chromebook/laptop that it started to get too dragging to find some quiet moments to engage in my personal writing. I felt like I wasn’t good enough to even go back to this habit of mine that I have been trying to develop since college.

It seems like fair enough for me to at least give myself this nth chance to find the heart to connect words again for an interesting twist of stories or even give life to the different characters I have in mind. But, can I really write better this time?

Maybe, yes, in time. I have to practice concretizing the ideas I have in a comprehensible piece. I was once here, in a similar state, and I needed time then to find my voice, my style of writing. I need to see this opportunity as another beginning where I have to develop the skill and continue polishing my craft. It is not going to be that easy, I know, but I am willing to start doing this passion of mine again. There are steps that I have to make sure I complete.

1. Rebuild the Habit

I have to set a time and place where I can concentrate on my writing – only writing. I have exhausted myself multiple times trying my best to sit down and finish a piece, but I get easily distracted with other “unfinished” tasks. So, for this coming year, I plan to rebuild my writing habit.

I have this particular notebook that I keep handy for notes. When I think of an idea for a story or a poem, I will write this down. Then, when I get home, when I am ready to face my laptop and complete it, I need to focus on it alone. No other tabs online. Perhaps have music as my buddy this time.

2. Read and read more

If there is something I regret this year, it is the habit that I lost – reading. I have a lot of books in the room which I have yet to finish or even open for that matter. I feel really sad thinking that I lost many hours too preoccupied with worrying about work and other related stuff. So, this 2018, I need to keep any work-related concerns in the school and do my writing and reading at home. No distractions from work – only unless it is truly urgent.

Also, in addition to this is to give me the chance to discover new styles and storytelling. I want to find new trends and flavors to writing as I am somehow stuck with my old books and favorite authors’ works solely. I think that I have to visit the bookstores more often or ask friends for recommendations. As I see myself too limited in terms of the genres I read.

3. Do and finish one task at a time

One other concern that has kept me from completing any manuscripts or even good short stories is that I always stay halfway done. I couldn’t seem to finish an entire story well. I let myself be distracted midway and then gradually forgot about the piece I was doing. To address this, I need to fix a certain rule whenever I sit down to write. Maybe, one good thing is that (a) no phones connected to the net while I write; (b) no checking of emails and social media sites; and (c) prioritize well – write them down.

With these three, I hope that I can gradually find my old “writer” self and see new moments to help me create a colorful as well as meaningful works to share with others. It is somehow difficult if I am going to look into it even though I only have to complete three tasks. But, this is for the me that I truly want to be in 2018.

Love Options Before the New Year Starts

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First love, love at first sight, or a love that lasts?

Many may instantly pick the last option because it promises a long time for a certain relationship. There is that hopeful feeling of spending love with someone who would actually stay for a while and not simply go on a bliss. But, how about the other two choices? Are they entirely bad picks for someone who is wishing, waiting, or have already experienced that complex event – love?

For me, not really. Even though I am not able to give reasons based on my own personal accounts, I do know that each of those options I provided has its own good point at a particular time in someone’s life. Let’s say for first love, whether it lasts for a few (who end up together) or it’s only a quick stop for many, has a lesson worth keeping. It is a reminder that you are capable of feeling a distinct connection and affection with someone, may it still be puppy love or a late bloomer’s first look at the concept of love. As a person starts that uncomprehensible sensation of butterflies in the stomach, a dozen tingling of ant-like movements from their feet to their bodies, the rush of blood to their cheeks, and the sudden beating of their hearts – love has arrived. Love has finally stopped by to introduce itself to that person.

Aside from that, there’s that dreamlike love at first sight moment that serves a magical twist to the typical meeting of two individuals. Personally, I don’t believe in this, as I try rationalizing it as simply a manifestation of perhaps an early stage of infatuation. But, I’ve heard friends share their love at first sight experiences, and I thought I have no right to question how they felt and how they faced those instances. It was love for them, and for me, only a person can say to him/herself when he/she is in love. No one else can do that for them. So, with those in mind, I can say that this particular magical moment may be a legitimate sensation and experience for those who actually are more self-aware of their emotions and can clearly identify it as love.

At the end, whichever option someone chooses, it is a personal experience that can only be made clear by that person. There are always lessons to every choice made, memories shared, and emotions felt. I perhaps need to open myself more to these possibilities as I bid adieu to 2017 and spread my wings further in 2018. Sure there would be something interesting to capture as I fill my collection of life experiences as well as fun trials along the way.

How do you read?

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Tagalog comics, English novels, Japanese manga, TV series subtitles, advertisements, newspaper reports, online article bits, and more: there are a lot of text that we read every day. They can be mundane, profound, inspiring, heartbreaking, or whatever the reader incorporates to them. However, there are times that reading is usually related to the opportunity of escape. When one grabs a novel of his or her liking, there is a great chance that that person chose such for a quick relief from the routines of his or her life. Many think that reading is only associated with the reading of novels or stories, but it is not the case.

Text is all around us. They convey different messages as they are in different forms. This is just a thought that I wish to explore in the coming days. What do you think?

I am ready to fall in love

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Has anyone really been ready to love?
Is there a certain schedule that you can mark in your calendar and finally set aside for a couple of days, weeks or even months? If there is such a thing, I wish someone could tell me the proper steps right now.

Is there a certain schedule that you can mark in your calendar and finally set aside for a couple of days, weeks or even months? If there is such a thing, I wish someone could tell me the proper steps right now.

Throughout the years, I have learned to simply shrug off the comments of people around me asking, telling, and sometimes, arguing on my current romantic/relationship status. There were moments from high school to my university days that people around me started meeting new circles of friends, enjoyed the companies of other cliques, and dated people they thought were “the one.” Now, I think with the many stories I’ve heard, and first-hand experiences that I’ve witnessed throughout those years, I also learned to stay aloof from the feelings of jealousy as my friends spent more time with their significant others; anger as they share their pains from a failed relationship; and distrust as they introduce new faces with glee and beaming smiles. In that process, I’ve led myself to a comfortable state of sympathy, empathy, and patience. But, there’s that particular feeling that I missed, curiosity.

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On Writing (3): Language – Filipino or English?

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Filipino or English, what should I use to better share my ideas? 

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With a background in communication studies specifically in language and culture, I learned that there isn’t a “better” language. Moreover, the thought of providing a distinct hierarchy of languages that makes one the best is affected by various factors which can be seen within the society and outside the society. There isn’t that one particular criterion that lets you identify one language that is better than another. The use of a particular mode of communication is also a result of people’s interactions and are associated with various factors such as the community’s history, values, and traditions.  I won’t expound on the minute details for each one as you may search for it in various scholarly articles (communication theories, language acquisition, multilingual concepts).

In my writing, however,  I still am bothered by this concept. Even with the idea of using various languages as an individual element in communication, I get troubled whenever I try to choose over the two languages that I know. Like right now, I am using English. Ha!

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On Writing (2): Lost interest, missed opportunity

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A dozen of scenarios plays back and forth in my mind. I get sleepless nights, tossing and turning with all these grand images knocking, crawling, and sometimes, frolicking their way to my consciousness. With this kind of dilemma, I set up a small space beside my bed with pieces of paper and sets of pens. This is my refuge as I try to organize the thoughts into actual writing. However, it never works out well.

I end up stunned. Staring blankly at the ceiling right after I opened my eyes from sleep. Whenever I try to remember, the ideas aren’t simply there at all. I’m left with a certain kind of emotion drawn from the event/scenario/whatevs, but the actual scene or thought isn’t present anymore. This is a real struggle especially when I want to write so badly. How I wish I could easily record my dreams and random train of thoughts like in a quick writing exercise where I jot down anything that pops into my mind. This way, I can go back and read through them then slowly figure out how a story can possibly develop from the seemingly balderdash record.

Aside from these challenges, I also end up losing interest in particular topics that I think I miss a lot of good opportunities. This year, I wish to overcome this lazy attitude and complete more written works.