Looking Back before Moving Forward to 2018

Today, I can say that welcoming my 25th year wouldn’t be that bad after I have grown to know more about myself as well as the different things that truly matter to me. However, before I can move forward to welcoming 2018, there are a lot of experiences that I need to look back to as I reflect and finally put them out of my mind and my heart. This is me letting go of those moments for me to have space for new ones in my head and my heart.

June 2013 – early 2015

  • ESL work -> got burned out from it 😦

Right after graduation, there were a lot of experiences that opened my eyes to how different it was to be a student and to be a part of the workforce. I spent almost two years of my post-grad concerns focused on a job which challenged me a lot (physically, mentally, and emotionally).

This was the time I realized that I wasn’t that good enough to be working in this field, but I didn’t let that stop me from doing well. So, I studied, I practiced, I endured, and I became a better ESL (English as a Second Language) teacher than how I thought I could be. Though, there were still a number of times when I truly wanted to cry from exhaustion and just quit. Like why in the first place was I there? I wasn’t even a speech communication graduate; I chose writing as my major!

Honestly, for the first three to five months, I had always thought of quitting. Then, the kids came to the academy. I had to endure all the challenges and faced them head-on. I loved the kids, I loved how I was sharing a part of my knowledge with them, and I love how I was becoming a part of their growth as an individual. As I saw them improve, I felt that I needed to be there to guide them. This was not an entirely good choice, though.

Continue reading “Looking Back before Moving Forward to 2018”

Advertisements

Rekindling the Drive for Writing

As I worked through my new job this year, there had been little time left for me to do any writing. I mean, typing stories or poems for myself. There had been enough hours for me to simply relax and sleep. I wanted time off from facing my Chromebook/laptop that it started to get too dragging to find some quiet moments to engage in my personal writing. I felt like I wasn’t good enough to even go back to this habit of mine that I have been trying to develop since college.

It seems like fair enough for me to at least give myself this nth chance to find the heart to connect words again for an interesting twist of stories or even give life to the different characters I have in mind. But, can I really write better this time?

Maybe, yes, in time. I have to practice concretizing the ideas I have in a comprehensible piece. I was once here, in a similar state, and I needed time then to find my voice, my style of writing. I need to see this opportunity as another beginning where I have to develop the skill and continue polishing my craft. It is not going to be that easy, I know, but I am willing to start doing this passion of mine again. There are steps that I have to make sure I complete.

1. Rebuild the Habit

I have to set a time and place where I can concentrate on my writing – only writing. I have exhausted myself multiple times trying my best to sit down and finish a piece, but I get easily distracted with other “unfinished” tasks. So, for this coming year, I plan to rebuild my writing habit.

I have this particular notebook that I keep handy for notes. When I think of an idea for a story or a poem, I will write this down. Then, when I get home, when I am ready to face my laptop and complete it, I need to focus on it alone. No other tabs online. Perhaps have music as my buddy this time.

2. Read and read more

If there is something I regret this year, it is the habit that I lost – reading. I have a lot of books in the room which I have yet to finish or even open for that matter. I feel really sad thinking that I lost many hours too preoccupied with worrying about work and other related stuff. So, this 2018, I need to keep any work-related concerns in the school and do my writing and reading at home. No distractions from work – only unless it is truly urgent.

Also, in addition to this is to give me the chance to discover new styles and storytelling. I want to find new trends and flavors to writing as I am somehow stuck with my old books and favorite authors’ works solely. I think that I have to visit the bookstores more often or ask friends for recommendations. As I see myself too limited in terms of the genres I read.

3. Do and finish one task at a time

One other concern that has kept me from completing any manuscripts or even good short stories is that I always stay halfway done. I couldn’t seem to finish an entire story well. I let myself be distracted midway and then gradually forgot about the piece I was doing. To address this, I need to fix a certain rule whenever I sit down to write. Maybe, one good thing is that (a) no phones connected to the net while I write; (b) no checking of emails and social media sites; and (c) prioritize well – write them down.

With these three, I hope that I can gradually find my old “writer” self and see new moments to help me create a colorful as well as meaningful works to share with others. It is somehow difficult if I am going to look into it even though I only have to complete three tasks. But, this is for the me that I truly want to be in 2018.

Ongoing Passion Project

Dance with the midnight Sun
Poetry with a bit of darkness in it.

Poetry with a bit of darkness in it.The year 2017 is almost over and in a couple of months, people will be doing their new year’s resolutions again while I’m still stuck on the list that I don’t know where I got the idea from exactly. Nevertheless, in the remaining days of this year, I will work on something that I think (still not sure, though) I can finish. *fingers crossed*

 

 

 

 

 

 

Estranghero
A work in progress. Still yet to complete.

With these two, I hope to go back to my old habits where I am not yet preoccupied with work concerns. The poetry may seem like a hodgepodge of sorts, but, they are because those works were from random pieces I wrote in a span of years. Then, the Estranghero is my chance to bleed some senses to a possible full manuscript. So, here’s a great end to 2017.

How do you read?

Tagalog comics, English novels, Japanese manga, TV series subtitles, advertisements, newspaper reports, online article bits, and more: there are a lot of text that we read every day. They can be mundane, profound, inspiring, heartbreaking, or whatever the reader incorporates to them. However, there are times that reading is usually related to the opportunity of escape. When one grabs a novel of his or her liking, there is a great chance that that person chose such for a quick relief from the routines of his or her life. Many think that reading is only associated with the reading of novels or stories, but it is not the case.

Text is all around us. They convey different messages as they are in different forms. This is just a thought that I wish to explore in the coming days. What do you think?

I am ready to fall in love

Has anyone really been ready to love?
Is there a certain schedule that you can mark in your calendar and finally set aside for a couple of days, weeks or even months? If there is such a thing, I wish someone could tell me the proper steps right now.

Is there a certain schedule that you can mark in your calendar and finally set aside for a couple of days, weeks or even months? If there is such a thing, I wish someone could tell me the proper steps right now.

Throughout the years, I have learned to simply shrug off the comments of people around me asking, telling, and sometimes, arguing on my current romantic/relationship status. There were moments from high school to my university days that people around me started meeting new circles of friends, enjoyed the companies of other cliques, and dated people they thought were “the one.” Now, I think with the many stories I’ve heard, and first-hand experiences that I’ve witnessed throughout those years, I also learned to stay aloof from the feelings of jealousy as my friends spent more time with their significant others; anger as they share their pains from a failed relationship; and distrust as they introduce new faces with glee and beaming smiles. In that process, I’ve led myself to a comfortable state of sympathy, empathy, and patience. But, there’s that particular feeling that I missed, curiosity.

Continue reading “I am ready to fall in love”

Learn, Write, and Complete a Story (Part 2)

As I grew more familiar with the rich sources of knowledge and interesting tales through various books, novels, and even scripts from plays, I searched for more opportunities to explore and improve my own writing skills. But, there are a lot of times that I get stuck.

The Characters and the Plot

It may be a good start for any piece of writing by having some images of the main characters and getting an idea for the general flow of the story. This is how I usually begin my work. I meet new people who may have a resemblance to the people around me or to my own. Sometimes, it’s sad that I had to give my pain to them as I find ways to build them up again for far greater challenges which lead to wonderful memories as well as better understanding of others and themselves. But, what happens when I forget some of these characters along the way. Many have haunted me, others simply just quieted down to the deepest parts of my mind. Here, I lose the work I’ve started. I get stuck.

Writing, Typing Aimlessly

Habit is an important factor in making any piece of writing work. This is where I am still lacking. Yes, I accept the fact that I used to type every day. I have grown fond of that routine, but that was when I was a student.

When I stepped foot in the professional world, I lost track of the passion that I once had when I took up a writing major. I needed to earn, not only for myself but most importantly for my family. I had two younger siblings who were both in college when I graduated from the university. That particular phase in our family life taught me to let go of my personal wants first and reach out to the members who needed the most.

Still, I tried to sneak in some writing once in a while. I appreciated the wee hours in the morning when there was no noise going around, not the time yet to worry about office responsibilities, and distractions all over the place. However, even with this kind of system, I usually still get stuck and I can’t finish any piece properly. *Properly in the sense that I know the story is done, my characters have had their moments, and I have said what I truly wanted to say.

Now, I have to set time for my passion again even though I know that I am starting to be busier than ever because I have to take care of 100+ kids. 😉

Baler: Surfing and So Much More for a Quick Weekend Trip

I caught some last minute heat as the dry season (there’s no summer in the Philippines, we only have two seasons 😉 ) finally said goodbye this year. I filled last weekend with a fair share of nature’s quiet beauty and the surprising waves of the open ocean in the stunning little wonder down south – Baler.

I have always been curious about this particular town as I usually hear about it whenever people search for nearby surfing destinations in Luzon. Being a non-confident swimmer (I still can’t do water treading), doing such activity isn’t really at the top of my list. But, surprisingly, I enjoyed surfing the most during my quick trip to Baler. Before I share that experience, here are some additional events that happened and the special moments that I also truly appreciated.

Continue reading “Baler: Surfing and So Much More for a Quick Weekend Trip”

Learning to Reach Out and Lead

Jpeg

For more than a month, I haven’t had a decent internet connection at home because I have been using my mobile data throughout May. Even though I have been in constant email (and some phone) correspondence with *ehem* Sky Cable Broadband, I still didn’t get my internet connection back. Anyhow, aside from that concern and looking into more positive experiences in the past month, I found time to work on a couple of writing which I hope to accomplish this weekend or roughly within this coming week. Also, I survived two weeks of commuting from my home in Pasig and to Circuit Makati as well as New Manila.

Those two weeks, so far, had me appreciate my work experiences in Ortigas. I didn’t need to take the MRT and two jeepney rides for almost four years. During the first week of my training, almost every moment was new to me. It was difficult because I had to go to work earlier than usual and face hundreds of faces, squished myself in the remaining spaces in the MRT, and inhaled the polluted air from Magallanes to PRC. But, all of those were compensated by the interesting lessons, fun stories, and even the surprising realizations during the orientation. Then, when I almost got the hang of it, the first week was over. Next stop, New Manila.

Honestly, even if I got the hang of riding the MRT and the long commute, I felt excited that I need not go on the same route again (so far). Still, I had to work on my commuting time management skills because I needed to learn how to go on a new route again. This time, it meant surviving the heavy traffic from home to Rosario, Libis, and Cubao. Now, I am happy to say that I worked my way through this challenge well for the past week. This is going to be my routine for maybe the rest of June. With this, I welcome the opportunity for new travel, I mean commute, stories throughout the month. All of these are compensated by opportunities in the classroom as a learning facilitator and somehow a student again. So far, completing two core senior high school domains was a wonderful chance of understanding the basic skills better. Surprisingly, I also enjoyed Math more than English. 😂

There sure are a lot to discover and appreciate. Then, here’s to another week ahead, starting with an interesting scientific experiment.

A Weekend of Love

I haven’t been able to write much on this blog because I have been busy finishing my final paper for my literary criticism/theory class. 😦 But, luckily, I was able to have a wonderful weekend. What started as a sort of simple yayaan with my MA classmates, became an eye-opening experience on my part.

Last May 20 and 21, I attended the first writing workshop of Reb Fiction (Rebel Fiction) under the Precious Pages Corporation. They are one of the imprints of this famous publishing house. So, I am not really familiar with their titles, but it caught my attention because they are a brand that focuses on Young Adult fiction. This is interesting because there are a lot of different stories and printed books out on the market that are catering to the “young” readers, but the genres of stories aren’t really that wide with Filipino prints. Reb Fic, on the other hand, is trying to offer more varieties of novels or novelettes for the young readers to enjoy. This is a plus point on my part because I hope to see “riskier” or even a bit of “experimental” texts that are still going to be relatable to the YA field.

There are a lot of popular novels under the YA genre, but those are mostly foreign prints like Harry Potter, Hunger Games, and others (I grew up with less known ones like those written by Margaret Haddix, the Nick and Norah book, and even that of The Curious Case of the Dog in the Night Time). This is a good chance for Filipino writers to work on YA stories and further add that certain touch of “Filipino” sentiments and values.During the workshop, I also learned more about the YA genre (and market) as well as the process of building a “hero/heroine.” I was even able to present one story already. Now, I hope to work on that manuscript as soon as possible, so that the ideas are still fresh in my head. But… I think I need to go back to my final paper first and (face my fears 😂) finish the semester well before this. Still, (crossing my fingers) I hope to submit it to Reb Fic before the end of this month. 😀 ❤

Northern Beauty and the Swarm of Travelers

2017 – This year, I promised myself that I’m going to travel more often and enjoy the beauty of the different local attractions. I have never really been that adventurous when it comes to traveling or going out in general. Yes, I had started meeting with friends more regularly starting mid last year but that was just it.

Anyhow, one of the top destinations on my list is the Ilocos province because (1) I have been more of a southern Luzon girl than ever so I wanted to explore the north; and (2) I have learned from friends that there are a lot of wonderful historical places to visit there (though, in general, the entire country is filled with beautiful historical destinations).

A random “yayaan” (yes, I’m going to code switch now) in the office sparked a search for an affordable travel package. Just a backstory, I worked for an outsourcing company for over a year and met a bunch of funny and likable officemates. 😀 I became more sociable (it may not seem so at first but I’m more of an introvert before). So, with this, I found an affordable package from Travel Galore.

A quick review of their services before I proceed with the fun parts of the trip. Continue reading “Northern Beauty and the Swarm of Travelers”