Waves of various height and strength punch me straight to the face whenever I try to jump away from my current position in life. Most of the time, the challenging waves are a mix of my worries, insecurities, uncertainties, indecisiveness, and many other negative thoughts fueled by the scared kid in my head. There have been numerous attempts to escape this destructive cycle. However, in all of my living moments, I still feel that I am lacking. Honestly, I think at the top of all these is my gradual fall to unproductiveness. I get sucked in the tedious habit of procrastination brought by the uncontrollable use of my mobile phone. What exactly brought me to this kind of escapist route?
Nearing the End of Another Decade (or about to start?)
The beginning of 2020 is the start of a new decade that was supposedly offering new opportunities for everyone to start afresh. Everything had been extra difficult, however, due to the spread of the COVID-19 in 2020. The unexpected turn of events last year made me reflect on the priorities that I must have in life. The situation also brought in many new concerns, which, I guess, needed to find an outlet to stay sane throughout the entire ordeal. In my case, I am grateful for work as I still had a seemingly normal system going on. The work-from-home setup was initially ideal though it took a toll after a couple of weeks of being or needing to be available any time of the day and the week.
As 2020 passed by seemingly quickly due to the limited routine that we had as cities quarantined for months, I was also pressed by the numerous happenings around my social environment. A lot of acquaintances got engaged, got married, and had babies. Those events brought good memories, somehow. However, 2020 also brought heartaches as close family friends died, and my small number of close friends got even smaller. There were days when I felt sad as I could not easily reach out to my closest friends. I think my introversion got more active during those times. Luckily, I had to endure those months of quarantine with my family. I could not imagine the feeling of those who had to be on their own during these trying times.Continue reading